I'm Your Back-Checkin' Cuz

Here is an email I once received at work from my husband.

"My Darling Wife,

I made a little discovery this morning after you left the house. That
coffee that I bought is also decaf. I don't know who's idea it was to
build a huge display of coffees, all of which are marked as decaf only
in fine print, but I'm going to be writing a letter. This is surely
going to cause some kind of accident. Anyway I thought I'd let you
know you might wanna get some caffeine in your system before the the dt's set in."

• He values caffeine.
• He knows how much I value caffeine.
• He looks out for me.

I love it.

P.S. It was totally a Starbucks that had the huge display of DECAF coffee. As if co-opting Italian culture and selling overpriced coffee wasn't bad enough. Morons!